Ode to the Waiter and Waitress

View and Listen to the FIQL Playlist Here

"Waitressing is the number one occupation for female non-college graduates in this country. It's the one job basically, any woman can get and make a living on. The reason is because of their tips."
-Mr. White (Reservoir Dogs)
The Waiter (masculine) and the Waitress (feminine) get their names because they "Wait" on hungry and / or thirsty customers. From the low-end greasy spoon to high-end 5 star restaurants, the waiter's job can run the gambit from a teenager's summertime gig to a real career.

The maître d'hôtel or "literally "master of the hall", is the pinnacle in the world of the waitstaff professional. They will only be found in the finest destination restaurants. The maître d' manages the waitstaff as well as the seating and are usually distinguished with a formal white apron that extends to the ankle. Although the average wage for a waitstaff employee in America was just $14,050 per year in 2004, tips can add a whole lot of easily "unreportable" income. If you have good service skills tips can help you pull in some decent tax-free cash as a waiter.

The waitress has developed a mystique that is attractive to many; since many waitresses are young, beautiful and independent. The diner waitress also has a reputation for being plainspoken and even insulting. These characteristics have helped secure the waitress’ place in film and music. The following playlist highlights many songs that were written about or inspired by waiters and waitresses.

Please add missing tracks to the comments.

The Playlist:

1. I Want The Waiter (With The Water) - Ella Fitzgerald
2. Eat At Joe's - Suzy Bogguss
3. Waitress In The Sky - The Replacements
4. Eggs And Sausage (In A Cadillac With Susan Michelson) - Tom Waits
5. The Ballad Of Dorothy Parker - Prince
6. Halley's Waitress - Fountains Of Wayne
7. The Waitress - The Waifs
8. Dear Catastrophe Waitress - Belle And Sebastian
9. Waitress - Live
10. One Meat Ball - Ry Cooder
11. Waitress - Tori Amos
12. She's Not On The Menu - SNFU
13. Sweetheart (Waitress In A Donut Shop) - Dan Hicks
14. Jo The Waiter - Gary Numan
15. Frim Fram Sauce - Diana Krall
16. Waitress - Freddy Jones Band
17. Waiter! Bring Me Water! (country version) - Shania Twain
18. I Wish Lunch Could Last Forever - Jimmy Buffett
19. Waitress Problem - King Automatic
20. The Beautiful Waitress - The Austin Lounge Lizards
21. Waiter - Nellie Mckay
22. Benny The Waiter - Moon Bog
23. Hitting On The Waiter - Heatmiser
24. Waitress - Hopesfall
25. The Waiter & The Porter & The Upstairs Maid - Bing Crosby
26. The Little Hooters Girl (album version) - Bob Rivers
27. Tip That Waitress - Loudon Wainwright III
28. St. Pete, Maitre D' - The Press

View and Listen to the FIQL Playlist Here

Read other columns in Buzzworthy

You can see more of Robert's playlists at Rhapsody Radish.

How could you leave out "Brandy (You're a Fine Girl)" by Looking Glass?! (unless you think she's a bartender in the song and not a waitress....)

Brandy (You're a fine Girl) belongs in the "Songs about Bartenders" playlist, which I am sure I'll get to at some point.

"And there's a girl in this harbor town
And she works layin' whiskey down
They say, Brandy, fetch another round
She serves them whiskey and wine"