I went through a period of my life where I didn't know how to live in the "real world." I used anything I could find (drugs, sex, alcohol, work) to numb myself. Sometimes I felt like a shadow in my own life. I was so absorbed iin myself, in my fears and delusions and pain.  This tape, two years sober, takes me back to that time. If my life had a soundtrack during those years, this wo... [+]

I went through a period of my life where I didn't know how to live in the "real world." I used anything I could find (drugs, sex, alcohol, work) to numb myself. Sometimes I felt like a shadow in my own life. I was so absorbed iin myself, in my fears and delusions and pain.

This tape, two years sober, takes me back to that time. If my life had a soundtrack during those years, this would have been it. It is like a dialogue between the woman I am today and the lost little girl I was. When I listen to it, I think of the people who loved me and what they must have gone through watching me try to destroy myself.

I remember how hopeless everything felt, like I was constantly struggling to get my head above the water. I remember how lonely I was, in a sea of people. [-]